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Redwood Falls Gazette - Redwood Falls - MN
  • Food: it’s what’s for dinner

  •   For most of my life, I’ve never cared for pizza. It was a take-it-or-leave-it food, with the emphasis on leave it. Also, I’ve never been a big meat eater. Ever since I began eating solid food as a toddler, I’ve always loaded my plate with veggies and starche...
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  •   Tapioca pudding is one of those foods people either love or hate. Me, I love it. I’ll happily eat all the tapioca pudding you put in front of me. But anyone else in my family, pbbbbtttt.  Note to hospital emergency room staff — if anyone in my family is ever brought in with poisoning and you need something emetic to quickly empty their stomachs...use tapioca pudding. It’s not the flavor, so they say. It’s the texture. They just can’t stand those rubbery little nodules floating in the pudding... ...those rubbery little nodules I happen to love. So I think we’re all in agreement here — tapioca is one of those foods people either love or can’t stand. There’s a second category of foods: ones people love or hate depending on how they’re used. My wife can’t handle coconut if it’s put into candy or pastries. The texture just makes her sick to her stomach. And yet, she has no problem going to the store, buying a bag of raw shredded coconut, and eating pinches of it purely by itself as a treat. It’s when coconut is added to something else it magically becomes sickening to her. For most of my life, I’ve never cared for pizza. It was a take-it-or-leave-it food, with the emphasis on leave it. Also, I’ve never been a big meat eater. Ever since I began eating solid food as a toddler, I’ve always loaded my plate with veggies and starches, and treated meat as more of a little side dish on the plate. And yet, any time I get the chance to order an all-meat combo pizza, I’m there, dude! Two foods I don’t ordinarily care for by themselves combine to create a genuine taste sensation.  The more kinds of meat you can pile on the pizza, the better:  sausage, pepperoni, BACON, hamburger, steak, chicken, venison, roadkill... Just keep pilin’, and I’ll keep a’eatin’. Then I want to grab myself by the shoulders, shake me, and bellow into my face, “What have you done to the real Josh?” since I’ve obviously been replaced by a pod person, an evil robot double, or an identical twin secret agent. (Note: everyone on Earth has an evil identical twin secret agent.) When I wrote “the more kinds of meat you can pile on the pizza,” how many of you noticed I didn’t write anchovies? Did you catch the exception there? I love fish — within limits. I like fish that comes in big slabs, like salmon, walleye, or (the king of slabby fish meats) halibut.?If I can cut it with a knife and eat it with a fork, it’s for me. But any seafood that comes out of a shell, nuh-uh. Crab, oyster, lobster... yuck. Just yuck. It’s partly the struggle to get the meat out of the shell that bugs me — it shouldn’t have to be that much work — but mostly the taste. Shellfish just tastes about 400 percent fishier than fish in slab form... ...which is exactly what other people like about it. Whenever you hear about people having good taste or bad taste, just remember where that metaphor came from.   
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